Feb 19, 2007

87% Cocoa

Oh right, offices and sugar. I'd almost forgotten.

Subj: Homemade cookies in the break room!
Subj: Leftover Halloween candy - UP FOR GRABS!
Subj: Girl Scout cookies
Subj: Extra doughnuts on the conference room.

And now you're 20 pounds heavier. Thank goodness you've been sitting on your ass all day, too. That helps.

I'm now begging (almost literally) my female co-workers to eat the weapons-grade dark chocolate I bought last week. Aren't women supposed to loooove chocolate? Did I waste that much money on Valentine's Day gifts in college?
Please don't make me have to eat another piece. It's sitting right there! Crap.

Now I'm so amped up on the stuff that I think I might be able to bend light rays with my mind.
Working on it... working on it... Damn! Distracted by imaginary itch. No wait, real itch. Better take care of that... oops, just scratched through to bone. That'll probably need a looking at. Oh wellhahahahahahahahahaha. Why won't my legs stop bouncing?!?

4 comments:

Christopher said...

Hm, was this by any chance a really dark, rich, foreign bar of chocolate with a name that I think is pronounced vaguely like - like the sound one makes after one's throat has been thoroughly coated with sweet, sticky, dark chocolate?

Because, if so, I think your wife tried to palm some of it off on me aprez-meeting Monday night.

It was good chocolate no doubt, but I had to foist it off on some other unsuspecting rube - share the wealth, sez I.

Lively said...

I see you're discovering the dangers of office life.

Basil said...

it's named after Yoda's home planet, actually.

Strip the enamel off your teeth, it will.

Andrea Hobbs said...

Hahaha! I know what you mean... My office has much sugar always. We have cake every two weeks it seems, and someone's wife is always baking them brownies to bring into work. It's really hard to have the self control not to eat it. Oh, and did I mention I work next door to a Specialties Bakery???